These Perfectly Careless Things
A novel by Tash Doherty
London, 2010. Fifteen-year-old Abbie Chesterton will do almost anything to feel wanted.
"Have we met before?" Max Fritz-Galloway said to her from across the garden table.
Half-full ashtrays, bottles, and beer caps lay strewn between them. Max was wearing a black T-shirt and a crisp dinner jacket. He had that strange kind of male beauty where none of his facial features made sense individually. There was nothing particularly attractive about his short nose or his hollowed cheeks. Yet when Abbie took in the complete picture of him, her insides began to tingle.
"With the other Etonians at Capital VIP," Abbie said. Fond memories of that night at the Ministry of Sound club arose in her mind. The club had multiple levels and a foam room, where students from England's elite public schools had paid to network with tongues. The hefty £40 entry ticket had been more than worth it.
"Of course," Max gulped, evidently trying to remember if he was one of the eight boys Abbie had pulled on the sweaty dancefloor. He hadn't been, but at least now he was desperate to remember her and obviously trying to chirpse her.
Keep reading the first 3 chapters for free:
"I melted into the pages." － Susan, Reader Review
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It's April 2010 in London. Abbie Chesterton is fifteen, drinking gin straight from the bottle at a house party, saying something cruel about her best friend so that two boys from Eton will keep talking to her.
Secretly, she wants to be an artist. Or at least she thinks she does. She keeps a folder of magazine cutouts under her bed, where her mother won't find it. Still, it would be much easier to pursue her dreams if she knew who she was first.
Then she meets Jonah Wood again, a childhood acquaintance. Jonah has a weird American accent and nerds out about films, but his intellect charms her. He's the first person to take Abbie and her art seriously. He thinks she belongs at his school, St Peter's Collegiate, and all Abbie has to do is build the perfect portfolio. As she builds it, she ditches Julie, her bus-buddy, the only friend who never left.
This semi-autobiographical debut will bring you right back to being fifteen, in all its cringey yet expansive glory. For fans of Sally Rooney, Euphoria, and, of course, Skins.
I started writing this novel when I was fourteen. Yes, it took me a while.
The ePub / PDF is the most author-friendly option. ⤵️
"I loved this! Similar to Normal People, though heavier on the young-adult angle, which I actually came to really appreciate." — Logan, Goodreads
"I missed this book when I reached the end - it was such fun! The author's voice and narration: both her writing style and her actual voice on Audible are enjoyable. Doherty's portrayal of the UK privileged life, combined with teenage sexual and social angst, was captivating and insightful." — Alexandra, Amazon
"Such a beautifully written coming-of-age story that made me travel in space and time all the way to London of 15 or so years ago." — Oksana, Goodreads
"abbbsolutely brilliant stuff — couldn't put this book down!!! read immediately !!" — Emilia, Goodreads
Dubstep. La Roux. All the songs that Abbie wished she had on her iPod that summer.
It was the summer of 2009. I barely knew how to type, plodding along on my mum’s ThinkPad laptop. I was 28 when I finally published the book. I’m not exaggerating when I say it took me half of my life to become an author.
For many years in between, I was distracted by going to a fancy business school and making lots of money in a tech job I hated. A very traumatic incident knocked some sense back into me, and I rediscovered my love for writing. I set my sights again on fulfilling my teenage dream of publishing this book.
Of course, I rewrote this manuscript from scratch many times. Since I moved away, it was nostalgic and beautiful to write about the city that raised me, London. Ultimately, I love the cringey yet bold narrative I have here. With the hindsight of being in my 20s, I was able to give space to the hushed challenges of being a teenage girl that I didn’t have words for as a teenager. Getting your period. Discovering masturbation. Having your first sexual experiences. Going to the family doctor who has known you all your life to get birth control. Taking a pregnancy test in the Starbucks bathroom.
It’s all in there: London, first love, and many younger versions of myself.
I write the Substack, Misseducated, where I'm on a mission to help the world be shamelessly sexy. Subscribe to get my latest articles in your inbox, about 2 per month!
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